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The Talk

20 May

I just finished catching up on all my DVRed shows.  The DVR is set to record certain shows every week or every day.  For instance, Oprah.  I truly love that show when it is good.  That’s the nice thing about DVR.  I can just fast forward through all the crap or erase a show that doesn’t interest me.

I swear I cry over something I see on Oprah at least three times a week.  What a sap. 

Did anyone see her shows on when and how to talk to your kids about sex?  Wow.  I’m no prude, but I am seriously dreading having that talk with my girls.  I did not have the talk with my mom until the deed was already done and I was terribly resistant to anything she had to tell me. 

My mom was a terrible snoop back in the day and I wasn’t about to go to her with any questions.  Anything I would have told her would have been told to my aunts, sister, dad, etc.  How mortifying.  I didn’t even tell her when I got my period and she didn’t find out for six months after. 

All things reproductive embarrassed the hell out of me.  If my mom hung my bra on the clothesline, I wanted to die.  If a love scene came on Dallas or Falcon Crest, I ran out of the room.  So the lines of communication were not good.  I had a set of 4 encyclopedias, that I still have, published circa 1965, that taught me all that I knew back in grade school.

Just watching the mom on the show give the talk to her daughter, wow.  I don’t want to do it, but I know I have to in order to have a healthy relationship with my kids.  I want them to be able to come to me with anything and not be ashamed, embarrassed, etc.  My God, I was 26, married and having to tell my mom and dad that I was pregnant with Ashley was so embarrassing.  It was like stating, “Hey folks, I had sex”.  So I definitely want things to be better for my kids.  I also don’t want my daughters sneaking off to K-Mart buying “things” and hoping for the best or sneaking around and cutting class in order to visit a clinic to get birth control pills.  Thanks Michelle for driving that day when I chickened out 🙂

The doctor on the show has a downloadable handbook on Oprah’s website.  Gulp.  She’s got some controversial stuff in there for the teenagers, but I guess it’s better coming from a parent than a friend on the bus.  It’s not like they won’t find out about it on their own. 

I’ve got a few years before I have to worry (I hope).  So far the questions coming from my kids have been pretty easy to answer.

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4 Comments

Posted by on May 20, 2009 in Kids, Life, Parenting

 

4 responses to “The Talk

  1. Jennifer

    May 20, 2009 at 12:52 pm

    same for me growing up. i tried to talk to my nephew. didn’t get far but at least told him if he ever had any questions….
    since mine is younger, i’ll get to wait and learn from your talk.

     
  2. Jolene

    May 20, 2009 at 1:13 pm

    Yay, Jennifer’s back!!!

    Yup, definitely not going to take my mother’s approach – “If I don’t tell her about anything, she won’t do it.”

    Gee, thanks. My kid will be the one informing all the other kids whose parent’s don’t want to tell them anything. I can see it now, diagrams and all 🙂

     
  3. Michelle

    May 20, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    I was just telling my mom a couple weeks ago about that time that we skipped school to go to Planned Parenthood. We were such rebels!

     
  4. Jolene

    May 20, 2009 at 9:33 pm

    Great. You confirmed for her that I was indeed a bad influence 🙂

     

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